Cartoon villain Bluto was last night under arrest after it emerged he’d been accused of a string of sexual offences dating back to the 1930s.
The alleged love rival and arch nemesis of Popeye the Sailor Man was however, defiant in maintaining his innocence in a statement to the press earlier today.
“Listen, I know it looks bad. I did used to chase after Olive with a lustful, crazed look in my eyes. Hell, I even tied her up a few times and yes, I admit it, maybe my intentions weren’t always 100% innocent. But I swear I’m not guilty! Popeye always showed up with a can of spinach in his hand and kicked the living shit out of me before anything ever happened.”
Bluto then went on to accuse Olive Oil and Popeye of a cynical attempt to reap financial compensation.
“Popeye’s not as popular as he once was. He and Olive are struggling financially. I know that for a fact. These allegations are about money and nothing else!”
Whilst it is true that Popeye and Olive have recently filed for bankruptcy, they maintain that this has nothing to do with the timing of these allegations.