Mickey Mouse awarded government contract to operate ferries

Cartoon character Mickey Mouse has been awarded a government contract to run extra ferries in the event of a no deal Bexit, it has emerged.

Transport Secretary Chris Grayling has defended the move, stating that he had “full confidence” in Mr Mouse to fulfil the contract.

“Mickey Mouse is completely trustworthy” Grayling stated, “I should know, he’s a close relative of mine and I’ve always looked up to him and aspired to be just like him.”

His backing came amid concerns that Mickey Mouse is in fact a fictional cartoon character who isn’t even in possession of a physical body, let alone a fleet of ferries.