A you gov poll has found that the public believe a sack of half-rotten potatoes would do a better job of negotiating Brexit than the Prime Minister.
The poll also revealed that most people believe the sack of spuds would be better placed to lead the Conservative Party into the next general election.
A spokesperson for Number 10 yesterday dismissed the poll:
“You can’t trust polls” the spokesperson protested, “How can people prefer a sack of old potatoes to Theresa May? There’s practically no difference between them! Surely, if anything, people should think the sack would do just as good a job of Brexit, not a better job.”